I totally agree with Twink. Give yourself a break Mila. He wanted to see that you cared. He wanted to talk to D. He is using any manipulative behavior he can to come over. Hence the yard work. When he told you that you don't know everything, he's right. You don't. What I hear there is that you are not listening - yet. I would think that's because it hurts too much to listen to anything he says right now. You barely know him right now. He looks like someone you knew, but he isn't right now. Twink - took 9 months huh? Good on ya! It's been years for me and she still sometimes gets to me. But it does get easier and distance helps a tremendous amount. It provides breathing space. Time to think.
Hang in there Mila. One day. Now dust yourself off when you are ready, and take your next step - refocus on you. You must be able to get yourself back in balance. Find that balance. Then you can help D. We'll go from there.
AJ
"Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter" MLK Put the glass down... "Yesterday I was clever so I wanted to change the world Today I am wise, so I am changing myself."
But it does get easier and distance helps a tremendous amount. It provides breathing space. Time to think. 
