Gypsy - My boys are great, they love spending time with me, panic at the slightest thing that might spoil that. Fr instance, they staying at their auntie's tomorrow and i didn't know the address, so my oldest was panicking then memorised the whole address to tell me (he is 7). Love em to bits, they are my world.
What do I want to improve about myself ?? - Well, I want to like to be ok on my own. I get very bored, very easily and like company.
Oh, and sadly, I think your both right in what you say about the grieving process. I guess I did that and had that get over it relationship already whereby my latest girlfriend hadn't. I appreciate you saying it, tho obviously not what I wanted to here. I am not going to 'pursue' this girl and wll just be a 'friend', but that will probably take time as right now there is obviously emotions from me and I believe still from her too.
KK - Yeh, I'm not looking, I wasn't looking when I met this girl, it just sort of happened and then was great and tbh, I probably need (as said above) me time for a bit to really find me. For 15 years, but for 3 months and then 2 months I've been in relationships and not sorted myself out. Not sure exactly how to do that mind as I love company asI say. Would really love my own place but then reckon I'd get lonely (currently live with 2 friends).
I've also been unemployed for a yeah now, ot made redundant and starting to run out of money really fast.
So
Step 1 - Give up Smoking (again) June 1st is the day Step 2 - Get back to running (have cough/cold for 2 weeks) as that helps my positive outlook Step 3 - Get a job Step 4 - Get a place Step 5 - Who knows, we''l do first 4 first.
Thanks again for comments.
I think I'll be back here again for a while as people's insights definately help me, even when it's not what I want to hear, need to hear it.
Will try and sort of catch up with you to guys this evening or the coming days
Feel terrible today. Got my boys for the nite so holding it together but on a low I've not experienced for a long time.
Was online Friday wen ex GF came on an uploaded some photo's i'd asked her to and the chat got jokey and turned sort of flirty. She was really complimentary of my pictures saying I looked good in them all and I asked her which one she thought I should have as my profile pic which she replied 'No5...Cooooor'. There was some other stuff said, nothing about us but it seemed really surreal and flirty and sort of weird that she would be doing that given the situation.
I went out last night but bailed early as just didn't like being out amongst other women, even when chatting to a few. I'm just not interested so instead of spending a fortune decided to get the last train home. I then made a mini mistake, I text ex GF and asked if she in her pub (she works there sometimes), but got no repsonse. She text earlier saying she never saw my text, did I pop in. I just said no, was on wat to station and realised I had 25 mins to train so if she there would of popped in for a quick drink. Noting else really said and ended with just general friendly, enjoy the rest of yr weekend sort of stuff.
Thing is, I know she wants to stay friends, but is that not odd when you break up ??? s the flirting not weird ??? It's messing with my head.
I spoke to an old friend (girl) I've known for 25 years earlier online and she said. It seems she does still like ya, if she's asked for space you just got to give it to her and see what happens. She said she was like that when she first got with her man and her respected her wishes and 6 years later they are so happy. Is that the dealing with the previous period she needs to deal with ???
ready for the 2 x 4s to tell me to stop clinging to hope, deal with it, sort myself out and move on. But typing it out and hearing it helps me.
