It's a creature of fear, disillusionment, distrust, and pain.
I don't know what she is going through, and neither do you, and in the state she is in she probably can't tell you what she is going through, and it will change to something a minute later even if she gets out sometime honest.
But... take a look at yourself too because this is filling you with disillusionment, distrust and pain as well, and I bet you don't know how you feel from day to day either.
It's OK. I've been there myself. You have to learn not to fear what is going to happen tomorrow. I know you just want to know what the future holds, but the truth is that we never know what the future holds, and until this happened and you started to think about your M ending, you were probably a lot less fearful of the future too.
I can guarantee you, anyway, that when you decided to start dating your W, you were uncertain of the future, and it didn't bother you. That is the place you need to get back to first, IMO: be comfortable with not knowing what is going to happen (you will never truly know anyway) because that is only attatchment. Whatever you decide to do when you fully detatched with be the right thing to do.
M-47,W-40,No kids D-filed 5/27/2010 Piecing - 10/21/2010 -=Soon to be banned=-
