May I ask some questions to fill in some gaps? What are your ages? You said you had been cheated on, was it your W who cheated that time? And, what family member passed away that affected her so much?
You said your W was inexperienced in R's, but did she date before the two of you were M? Could you explain about you "taking care of her" for ten years.
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
