Could it be?

[glamgirl]

Upside, Snodderly is so right about the depression. The depression is what is holding your h back. I can see it so clearly with my own h. Any possibility on having the depression addressed by your h?

I also clearly see where you stand, since I am in a very similar situation. You so want them to make a move, but then they are so self-absorbed and paralyzed with depression to move forward it leaves you thinking what am I waiting for and how long can I hold on. It is such a difficult situation to be in for both spouses. They want to move forward, but they can't.

Is filing the right thing now or do you just need to let him go and you be free to be you without his issues or do you feel you can't really move on unless you are divorced? Are you using the D to try to push him forward or is the D for you to be able to let go? Is the D to allow you to be free to date and move on with another? I think it's important to really understand what the D is suppose to accomplish for you.

A D is not going to magically take away those desires of love for your h. The D is only a piece of paper and you will still need to deal with your own unique healing.

This really is such a painful and long drawn out journey. That is why standing for your m is so much harder than walking away. You have done so amazingly well though. It takes someone of such strong character to stand in the storm for so long.

Do you ever think of yourself as weak? I am having a difficult time with myself thinking that I am viewed as weak for putting up with so much. I often wonder if that is how my h views me too.

Hugs!