That's great, gamn. I am glad to hear you have hope. I hope everything is okay for you.
I tried. I have asked him many times, and he keeps denying it. I have cards from her to him, saying he will get her naked for Christmas, which I confronted him with. I overheard him telling her he loves her on the phone - he thought I was at work - didn't know I was home. I confronted him right away - he told me he was talking to himself, then changed it to I made it up in my imagination. I don't get it at all. I am at a loss. I still don't get it - this kid is young enough to be our daughter. 18 years younget than him - a 20 year old kid. It' crazy. I pointed out to him, he is throwing his family away for something that wont' last.
I don't understand when he knows he is "caught", why he keeps lying. I hope, in the back of my mind, becuase somewhere in him he does still want us to work. Or maybe he is just using me for everything I do for him. Knowing if we get divorced, he will lose everything, including the house and the kids.
So, I don't know if I should confront him again (which makes him really mad, which is partly why I don't or keep pretending it isn't happening)
I do think he has noticed all the changes I have made - though,I feel he is the one that really needs to make them. The biggest changes I made have been putting him before the kids.
For now, I am waiting for this "affair", to blow over. I keep saying it can't last much longer. This is a kid - a toubled one, who has gotten kicked out of her mother's house, sent to live with her grandfather - total basket case, literally. Her parents were never married. Her father is living with someone he got pregnant - this kid obvoiusly was never taught morals or values. My husband is the adult - I just dont' get it. I hope its as simple and as complicated as a mid life crisis.
I am tired of being lied to, disrespected and used. I am tired of being lonely and always wondering if he is with her. I am tired of not being able to trust...but the alternative, I guess, I am not ready to face.
I do know if I said to him - stop the affair or leave - he would leave, just becuase he doesn't like being told what to do.
With all that said, I won't give up and just hope he snaps out of it and is the man he used to be.
