If you read on this board and especially the others, you will be amazed by how many people in exactly your situation were "nearly sure" their souse was not having an affair, only to find out they were wrong. Let me repeat: until you rule it out 100% you are wasting your time trying to fix the marriage or even trying to get her to talk about it.
While I think I've been vigilant for an affair, I don't know how I can rule it out 100%, especially if it were on an emotional level. Any ideas? If it was the case and I found out much later than now, I doubt I'd have the strength to try to make it work anymore. I get the impression she wants this to work, I just wish she'd do more.
I've been thinking a lot about role of depression in all of this. She was on medication at one point. It would explain her unwillingness to find solutions, tiredness, untidiness, and her propensity to blame herself. There's a lot of drinking as well. Are there any resources someone could recommend along that direction?
