H said the only guilt he felt was for not leaving my crazy a-s years ago.
That I should move on as he has. That he could never love me. That he now found real love and is happier now than he has been our entire marriage.
He doesn't believe I suddenly have a life. Says I can't need anyoney from him since I'm gone to my divorced friends house every weekend. That I'm spending money on that instead of the kids.
Everything feels so hopeless. I can't handle another 39 years of struggling to get over what was done to me in the first 20.
I feel so unloveable and worthless. I don't even know how to play with my own kids. I wasn't allowed to play growing up. What kind of a mother is that?
My kids deserve someone who is whole and not messed up.
