Cause for alarm?

[OfficerInNeed]

No omw does not call me unless something important comes up and in that case my W will be on the other end with me listening.

I did not want me W to know that we had this contact because she would feel it justified her talking to om and also would thing it is me being controlling. I worded this for her so many times in the past about "protecting our marriage" and "its not the same" and the responses I get "there is no marriage" and "we are just friends" noone or anything can convince her otherwisesn she believes what she believes and that is it.

So I made the decision do to what I had to do to protect our marriage without my W knowing. I slipped up today bit to be honest I am tired of it.

Maybe I should just lay it out there like lotus suggest.

To us it is an affair but to her it was jist a friendship and she is set on thinking that. The only way I can ever prove to her we know its more than that is buy putting the facts out there but I am not willing to expose my intel gathering.