It HURTS so bad, desperately need re assurance

[MrBond]

So if you feel so strongly that the twins are your daughters, why did you not ask for custody for them as well?

I mean you say or would like us to assume that you consider them your kids, yet your actions don't show it. I understand that biologically they are his kids, but as a "father" if you felt that they were going into an abusive household, I would assume you would protect them as well.

Also, the way you mentioned the word "premature" makes it sound like they were flawed in some way. And even though you mention how THEY consider you their "daddy", you don't say how YOU felt about them. You don't say how YOU loved them as your own Ds. This is important because you say that your W knew you "accepted" the twins. But accepting something is different from loving something. Did she truly know that you loved them?

Right now your posts aren't showing it.

What you don't get is that currently that's how your W sees things. She sees her H as accepting and willing to love another person's children into their family. She might even believe she is wrong for betraying her husband with you (as screwed as that is) and is happy that her H is willing to take her back.

I think you really need to acknowledge it's her H so that you can see the way she might be viewing things. You've become the OM in her mind.