I wouldn't listen to what your H said the T said. Addicts will lie to make them seem like the good guy. It may very well be that he's addicted to the thrill. That's still no excuse.
IMHO your H needs to see that he can get a RUSH with YOU. First thing to do is upset the current dynamic that he has going on. Packing up his things is the first step. Think of it like an initial wake up call.
After that, start taking care of yourself. I mean really pamper yourself and make yourself look and feel great. This is for you and not him. This will make you much stronger.
Eventually he may see the strength and beauty that you have. Then it will be YOUR decision as to whether or not he deserves to be with you.
You have a small window of opportunity to make a huge statement. You can do this.
M-43 W-40 2D - 9 and 5
Emotion, yet peace. Ignorance, yet knowledge. Passion, yet serenity. Chaos, yet harmony. Death, yet a new life.
