Need a Plan for My Marriage

[CityGirl]

Luv is pretty darn amazing so get in touch with her!

[Steve McQueen]

If you look under "gigs" under the LA area of Craiglist often you will find people look for immediate help (landscapers, catering companies, movers and so on). Perhaps you can pick up a few "gigs" to at least get the "legal fund" started.

landscaping cowboy! I told you that months ago when the snow was melting. Just like thunderbolt and lightfoot.

Get yourself some anti-depressants or an adjustment if you need, you have to take all of this in stride and realize it is no skin off your back, and its for the best (or she will get more bitter and may never want to come back...)

anger, resentment, nothing new that is interesting is a turn off. it is not proper db'ing to act like that.

[LSG]

Steve,

I don't want her back. I am done with her. After what she has done with the divorce papers, she is not "worthy" of me. It is all in stride with me because I just don't care about her. I do care about my kids and what she is doing to me and them for her own selfish reasons. Maybe you can take that in stride but I cannot. I do not show my anger or resentment to her. I guess I am not doing proper DBing right now. I cannot with the way she is acting with no remorse.

It is about the kids to me, not her.

I guess there is a time and place for everything! I have been doing my best at DBing. Maybe I failed, maybe I didn't, but I know I have tried.

[LSG]

CityGirl,

You are right about luv. I feel the same way about her you do from her thread. I will get in contact with her. I am just not sure how she wants me to do that. I will wait for her to provide me the way to contact her.

You are all pretty amazing here. That is why I am here for the support of people like you and luv and all the others that are here to help me be to be a better person.

[LSG]

Today W did thank me for doing the clothes, and the I left a note telling her that I took the kids with me to my meeting at McDonalds. I also left her something in the fridge for dinner. I was not trying to do anything nice for her. I guess I just thought it the right thing to do. She told me she is taking the kids to a movie this weekend, and I said okay. It is for the kids.

She does go in the room by herself. I am glad, so I can come here to get out my frustration and not at her.

This is just part of her sneaky game to look good in the D. I am so skeptical of her actions. I lack so much trust in her.

I do treat her courteously, and that is the best I can do.

[Onthemountaintop]

This is just part of her sneaky game to look good in the D. I am so skeptical of her actions. I lack so much trust in her.

Be skeptical in your head, but try not to do it in your actions. IF she is doing this to 'look good' in court, then you'll only look bad acting badly.

[LSG]

OTMT,

I am doing exactly as you say. It is hard, but it is necessary.

I have to it for me and the kids.

[LSG]

luv,

When you have time please let me know how to contact you.

I know you are going through a lot right now. I do not want to add anymore to your stress. You are going through a very difficult time. I understand that so well.

Let me know when you have the time.

Thank you so very much! I am very sorry to bother you!!!

[idontunderstand]

Today W did thank me for doing the clothes, and the I left a note telling her that I took the kids with me to my meeting at McDonalds. I also left her something in the fridge for dinner. I was not trying to do anything nice for her. I guess I just thought it the right thing to do. She told me she is taking the kids to a movie this weekend, and I said okay. It is for the kids.

She does go in the room by herself. I am glad, so I can come here to get out my frustration and not at her.

This is just part of her sneaky game to look good in the D. I am so skeptical of her actions. I lack so much trust in her.

I do treat her courteously, and that is the best I can do.

This is the best you can do right now. As difficult as it is, try not to be mean or even resentful. Pigskin suggested to me to try and treat her as a woman you just met. You would be kind and courteous but not flirty or loving. Or, picture her five years down the road after she has left and you have gone on to a fantastic life, better than what you have now. Your kids have adjusted with your love, understanding and help. Now she says she wants to come back. Sorry, lady, I'm doing just fine without you. I wouldn't have it any other way. No more drama, lies, back stabbing and being made to feel like dirt.

You are hurting-that's to be expected. In recent posts, it also sounds like you are finding the strength you need. You realize what you must do and are taking the difficult steps to do it.

Strength, courage, honor. I think Coach says that.

You have them all.

[LSG]

IDU,

I am having a better couple of days even with the looming Divorce over my head and no counsel to help me. I am meeting with a non-profit attorney group to see if they will help me and my kids to stay together and give me some financial relief to deal with the situation.

I hope I will not need it for long because I have an interview on Tuesday with the same company that my W works for. I have always wanted this job, so it is not because she works there. I am so excited. I have to get it. It is perfect for me. She does not know, and I will not let her find out. It is in another building far away.

I also have another company interested in me too. I am so happy. I just hope I am not disappointed. I need a job, so bad, and I could afford to live separately with the kids. This will help to gain custody I hope. Everyone wish me luck. I am still trying to sell the prints my parents have for additional funds for attorney's fees. I can receive waivers for some of the filing too. I have to keep trying and not give up hope for me and the kids.

I communicate sometimes with the OMW, and I feel so bad for her because she is just as scared and worried as I am, but I do have to worry about my situation first. I do provide the support to her that I am able to because I feel so bad for anyone going through this, and she does not deserve this. No one does. He has not said a word to her about the conversation that my W and I had that we are communicating. She does not know what to think about this, and I don't either.

These have been some good days, but I know I will have bad ones too, and that I do not want to happen.

Luv, let me know another way to chat with you about attornies in the LA area. I did not post this to your thread because you need that space for yourself and your sitch. I do not want to post unrelated things to yours.

It is nice to have your own place just for you. Let me know what you think when you have a chance. Thank you!!!