MLC - standing by my man

[AJM]

And I would like to point out that I don't consider it strategy, it's necessity for me right now because I did feel used and emotionally abused. The strategy aspect is an added bonus.

Ahh....the voice of reason rears it's head. The time of Mila is dawning... That's exactly how it should be Mila. Somebody has to look out for you and it may as well be somebody you trust...you! Recognizing that you need distance is incredibly huge. You do need that distance. You do need time for you. You do need to work on you, much like the idea of putting on an oxygen mask on yourself prior to helping those around you (on an airplane). Start the breathing...Stop the bleeding... Kudos to you Mila.

Sent H a reply to the appointment request. Told him you can schedule it after June 7, if you wish. That's it....

He just emailed back

You told me last week that you would be available this week... Why do we have to wait 2 weeks?
Your emails are very short and it’s hard to know what’s going on.... But it almost sounds like you don’t really care if we see her together or not...

That's an excerpt. But think about what he is saying there. He may be fishing to see if you care. The truth is you do care, but you have other issues to deal with. I suggest you keep it that way for a while. This is really not about you, but about him at this point. He wants what he wants, and is wondering why you cannot see that. Why doesn't everyone see what he sees? It seems so obvious.
You can't know what he wants to talk about until you go. There is just no way to see what direction the conversation will go, and with the dynamic of three of you in the room, it would be unpredictable anyway. Go in with an open mind. You do need to hear whatever is said, at some point in this journey.

Mila, have you ever raised a teenager....? Are they predictable? Are you able to rationalize what they are thinking or why they do what they do? Or why they hurt you? Have you ever doubted they care? Do you sometimes get postcards from the other side when dealing with them?

Take the time for you and don't play games. Keep your schedule and if he wants to catch up he can. But there is no reason to let him hurt you. That's your choice and one you are likely very close to enforcing. This is the age of Mila now. It has to be because you have to look out for you. Not in a mean or game playing way, but out of necessity. Don't hesitate on that. Don't think it can be different. Focus more on you. Figure you out. Figure out what you want from a relationship. Don't limit that thinking to what you had or what he was able to give in the past - this is new and he will be new and the old rules won't likely apply.

Your schedule. Your needs. Age of Mila. For now.
Do the work, Mila.
AJ