I feel i can't make an ultimatim about he A at this stage.
I don't know that healthy boundaries and ultimatums are the same thing.
Nobody knows what you are willing to put up with but you, but it isn't wrong to not want to be the only one working on your M, and right now you are the only one working on it.
I know how it can feel, but I don't know exactly how you feel about it. If you can let go while still being open to working on your M should your H return after the A runs its course, well... that is for you to decide. I couldn't do it while still living in the same house with my STBXW, and I tried.
No matter what path you chose, I suppose, you need to make taking care of yourself a priority since there is no M to work on while one spouse is in an A.
M-47,W-40,No kids D-filed 5/27/2010 Piecing - 10/21/2010 -=Soon to be banned=-
