What does this mean?- the WH's regrets?

[newmama]

And I was also thinking of asking him to install the carseat, ha! Hopefully he'll feel like he's contributing.

Gatsby, I really think that is a grrreat idea! I see on this board all the time where the DB coaches are telling the wives to let their Hs do things for them- it must be a male ego thing because they like to feel needed!

In retrospect tonight, I think it's really interesting that he asked if I got the baby gifts. I read on somebody's thread (maybe yours) about love languages. And maybe my WH likes to give gifts. He's been giving me a couple of gifts, but I never said thank you for the baby gifts. I was not in that place at the time. I said thank you for the Mother's Day gift. I think he likes my appreciation. Which is hard for me to give. Because there's so much that I HAVEN'T appreciated lately.

And Coach and Puppy were saying how men like to be appreciated for their skills- I am thinking gifts, too! (duh- don't we all? ) I completely understand why you haven't wanted to thank him though- you know I understand!

This is just really hard. Giving with the hope of getting something back in the future, no guarantees, etc. And to the person who wounded you so deeply.

OK I admit I have faked acting nice when I didn't want to because I hoped for a reconciliation outcome! But other than that I really try not to expect something in return! I think the giving thing must be a form of love and maybe respect which is something that I have a hard time feeling for WH so I do know what you mean.

The question is, am I supposed to change that about myself to assuage his ego?

From what I see on this forum, the real way to get some of our WASs back is to genuinely change/improve areas that bothered them but that we also felt we needed to improve.

Maybe a way of staying strong but changing a little is to be less controlling and to let him take the lead? I don't know-just brainstorming! OK off to a girls night out! It was fun "posting" to you!