Young Wife wants to walk away

[Ton Of Bricks]

Sounds good. And if she never leaves she won't be missing anything. If she gets out there for real, she is going to go "girls gone wild". Thats what they do. The world is going to look amazing for her. So brace yourself. You know you can't tell her not to do it. What you may do is do some exciting things together with her it may keep her from having to do the affairs part.

She is pretty reserved and while she wants to have fun, I am not sure she is looking to go wild as much as she may be looking to explore other relationships to find out what else may be out there. At least she is having the foresight to realize that she may be making a mistake, but I fear she is lost to me and I will end up in a power struggle over the children. I guess I fear a lot right now. I believe that she has to get over her depression before she can even address "us", which makes it a long road indeed.

For you this is that "snake" that represents the devil. The one who is wedging in between your relationship. The hard part of this is you can't explain it to the wife. You can simplymake sure if she gets out with you that you have meaningful interactions .

I've been dealing with her sister for quite some time. They are VERY close, and her sister is not a model citizen. She has some strange views on life, and I see my wife adopting some of her mentality already. Her sister has taken over her mother's home because the mother cannot defend herself. They live in poverty and have no goals to improve themselves. I HATE that our children stay there because it's a very unhealthy environment, and there are very little boundaries set for the kids. They come back to me and I become the bad guy who enforces all of the rules. It's not fair. My wife has never been a strong mother and now because of depression, I see her attentivity has lessened a great deal. The mother steps up to help, but cannot do it all because she is not in good health. I am ok with things right now but fear things getting bad...

Most men would love to beat the OM and any representation of him. How did it feel for you? Did it change the way you relate to your wife?

It felt great. I was validated by several members of her family and friends who know the guy and describe him as someone who would try to worm his way in. She is mixed about it. At first she kept talking to him via texting (HATE THAT CRAP) but after I made it a point to push the respect factor I believe she has since backed off but can't be sure. She left her phone lying around the other day and I checked it when she wasn't looking and all of her messages were cleared. She has always been honest with me so I don't want to assume the worst, but again, I have trust issues.

Your at a better place than most of us. I love how you view the concept of family. Thats whats going to hold you in there, family. I'd focus on doing things which will help increase her involvement and pride in her family. There are alot of examples on this website, but your situation is not as far out of control like the rest of us.

I talked to her today. She is bringing our daughter home. I can't wait to talk to her and act cool. She has always been kind of a slob and i am a neat freak. I know that she appreciates me for it. I have been myself and have cleaned the house better than normal ( I have more time on my hands lately.) Hopefully I will let her "unload" some of her depression on me and i will just listen. Wish me luck.