Didn't your husband say one of his issues is that you don't understand the bond between him and his parents? That's the way he feels. Look at how you feel about their bond. I bet it was noticeable.
if i don't understand, then at least explain to me why the bond is so different from everyone else's? communication. is it okay for someone to say, you don't understand and not back it up with something? we have a disconnect. that's fine. so help me understand the bond. that's all i ask. maybe i will understand it a bit better. if he doesn't want to explain it, then i have nothing to go by except for my own interpretation.
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You say over and over you feel foolish, don't want to look foolish and are worried that you will look like a gold-digger. Why are you worried about what other people think of you?
if i don't get my m back, i may lose my own family in the process. they are dead set against reconciliation. they don't understand why a strong person like me has allowed someone like him to have this kind of effect on me. what kind of woman wants to be with a man who clearly has stated he no longer wants you. and is hurting you like this for what? i should just walk away if he no longer loves me.
even i question myself. why do i want to stay? i am looking for a reason beyond love. it has to be about more than that.
the legal stuff is just chipping away at what's left. i was totally honest with my cards. i didn't claim anything i gave him. i understand that it's normal that they would claim a lot more and try and work out something in the middle. but the stuff he claimed belongs to me. why should i now have to fight for what belongs to me? i am not negotiating anything. i did not ask for it. cake eating? uh, not while i'm alive.
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This causes you from expressing what you really want and need.
i want to know the real reason why this is happening. i want a chance to get through to his head how i truly hurt i was. i need him to see that i was never a threat to his family or their relationship. however, i need to know where i stand in with him. i don't want to be a mother to him. i want to be his wife. i don't want to spend my vacation time, holding on to his jacket, cell phone, water bottle, snacks, etc. while he roams freely. i want our vacation to be like our first. when there was no pressure. just us. we did what we wanted, when we wanted, and how we wanted. it was just us. we had so much fun. i didn't think about what my parents would have thought. i want to be lost in good conversation. i want to learn about h. not h's parents. it's not that i don't care but we can worry about the parents later. i want him to want me.
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So what are you doing to save your marriage?
trying to eliminate the anger. not really working. trying to GAL and keep busy without breaking the bank. although, it's really hard but i am trying. i'm giving him space. it's the biggest gift you can give a WAS, right?
