still separated, headed for D?

[newmama]

If they are a good father, if they are a hard worker--the worst cases can find SOMETHING.

yes these things are true about my WH.

and admiration is one of his LLs.

So he can't love me if I don't respect him? But how would he expect me to respect him when he left me to be with a trashy hobag?

I keep remembering somewhere (maybe the B!tches book) that men want a playmate. (lol- not JUST a bunny playmate! someone to have fun with!)

---book says that men get "energized" by our being with them while they work on a project or watch tv or whatever. Just quietly being with them puts them in a good mood.

Yes I have read this repeatedly and it was something my WH told me he loved- just being in the same room as me and he really liked it when I took interest in working on the house. I am so embarrassed that I used to complain about how long it would take to do remodeling but I would definitely praise him when it was done. Gosh, I just was "immature" or something! I have said to him on more than one occasion (when he used to see S at the house)when he asked why I started working on the yard or something:
"I am being a 'grown-up' and just doing with it."