help with a plan

[pigskin]

If you see her as in a crappy mood, are you sure it isn't converting friendly into just distant?

You must have been there before. This is exactly what I think about.

I try to be "lovingly distant", but am sure it is more distant than anything. To me, it is impossible to be loving toward her. I have to settle on friendly for now. Not overly friendly but not pissy, either.

What does she want? I am finally done with her B.S. She knows it. Should I make more of an effort to be more loving and not so distant? Doesn't seem like the time is right, but I've been wrong, lots of times, before.

This is tough and a fine line to walk, as I've mentioned before. You don't want to have the "everything is super" attitude and indirectly seem like you are OK with her behavior. But you can focus on everything that is good in your life outside of your relationship and make sure all is super in that respect. Maybe that can help with your attitude.

The only way I can think of that helps is to treat your wife as a female acquaintance, not your wife. You wouldn't be affectionate, but you would be polite, charming, and friendly.