I have come home to an emptied house....What next?

[Gynandtonix]

Both lawyers I have spoken to say the same;
Do not change the locks as she has legal access to the home she is on the mortgage for.
I have grounds for D - Adultery. But she has to admit it.
The stuff she took when she burgled the house is legally hers as it was bought whilst we were together. There is no case of theft here.
Getting a D is not the end of it - it seems that you must also separate officially in financial terms.
I didn't know this. I thought a D was the end of it all.
I am advised as everything is amicable now, that we come to an arrangement with regards to custody of the kids and over financial matters.

Yesterday my eldest, 10yo, over heard my WAW mention the OM's name a few times in a phone conversation between the WAW and her Sister.

So now I know that he is back in the scene as well. This just confirmed my suspicions.

To cap it all I have a WAW who has rented another place to stay and taken everything of hers and the boys.
The PA is on the go again.

Basically she wants to live the fantasy life of the affair, ensure the boys still see me, and I am left dangling if the affair goes sour and then she could come back.....

Perfect scenario for her in her mind - no doors are closed.
I asked her flat out if she had started D proceedings. A straight no was the answer.

But this tells me nothing.
She has lied in the past, and will do so again.

More worryingly, my eldest has 'vented' some of his frustrations by peeling back some of the wallpaper in his bedroom. He also defaced one of his posters by writing me, himself and his Brother in a circle with the words 'who loves who' inside the circle. Mum is outside the circle.

So do I wait?
I don't want to start D proceedings yet - I don't feel ready.
I am still wearing my wedding ring - she is still wearing hers.

I aim to join a Gym soon and exercise.

I have enrolled on a dating site for other parents.

I want to break up the PA.
I will need help for this.

Puppy, I believe you are highly rated.

The frustration is also in the way I have been played and left swinging in the wind. This was planned for a while. The decision may only have been taken recently to actually leave me and separate, but it may have been planned from when she first came back in December.

This sitch is so similar to quite a few sitches I have read in this forum. Some were successful in getting back together.

It gives me some hope.

Help...

Regards,
Gyn.