I am so sorry that the T has characterized you so unfairly. I have met you and you do not strike me as a generally unhappy miserable and bitter person. On the contrary, I found you to be so upbeat, making the best of things and there for me even when things were tough for you.
Good therapists usually don't talk about other people - they focus on the patient. I am surprised that the T would say such things about you - especially during the first session!
I know that when The X went to C, he would always start out by putting me down - and how the T was his ally in affirming his beliefs about me. Usually as time went by, the T would start to guide his actions to treat me better.
Maybe your H was just venting during the first session and the T was just validating to gain his trust. Your H is feeling insecure about his decision and twisting T's words into support for his decision. It may be your H is projecting his own feelings onto you right now. He is after all feeling, unhappy, miserable and somewhat bitter by his own admission.
Give it time, Jackie. Meanwhile maintain your perspective and continue to work on yourself and take responsibility for your 50% - but no more.
You are a wonderful person. We all have faults - we are human - but none of us are the monsters that our WAS make us out to be!
If you need to get away, feel free to come and visit me. You are welcome anytime. Just give me 24 hours to clean my house! It is a mess!
