WAW and me in 11th hour!!!!

[Ken62]

No real advice for you at the moment, Ken -- just wanted to let you know I was listening and following along.

Puppy

Thanks Puppy for your time and caring!

Well I saw W for the first time in 6 weeks. She showed up at Mass and afterwards I was walking up to talk to our choir director and she was right there at my side. Kind of took me off guard because I had gotten so use to her NOT coming to church anymore. I'm not sure what my reaction looked like to her. I almost felt ambushed. It was wierd.

She was there to return a big box of mics to the choir director that she used for her after school program. She asked me if I would help her unload it from her car and I said sure.

As we were moving the box into the church she mentioned that she had talked to S24 and that he had told her that he was going to go to counseling and she asked if I had anything to do with that. I said that yes, I had talked to him about looking into it through work. I also told her that S20 had just gone to her first session the day before with my C.

When we got to the room to drop it off she needed to write out a check and so I waited. She talked about reflecting on the past years more lately and that she wished me nothing but the best. I told her that I also wished her nothing but the best but I also felt like she was just throwing me bones.

She then asked for a hug and I said sure and while we were hugging she talked about how she missed physical touch and being lonely but again I felt like she was just throwing me a bone because she had just spent the previous weekend with OM so I thought it was a bunch of BS. I did notice that she wasn't wearing any rings (she usually wears her mother's ring on her right hand and a ring from OM on the middle finger of her left hand) but that could have been because she was in a show.

She talked about still being gone for only the summer but I still don't think it will only be three months (I would like it to be three months but I don't think it will be). D19 thinks it could be 7 months and D20 thinks it could be 1 year and other people feel it could be indefinitely. She also said that she was trying to get back to church but only had yesterday and next Sunday left before she leaves town. I will be surprised if she actually shows up again next Sunday. Actions speak louder than words!

She then started talking about the kids and said that she just feels like they are punishing her and this is when I knew for sure that this was still not the W that I had M. She had used the word "punish" two times in our last conversation on April 12 and to me this just screams VICTIM! She talked about how she didn't get any cards or presents on her birthday or on Mother's Day and I told her that I didn't get any cards or gifts from them on my birthday either but it didn't matter to her. She also mentioned that whenever they get together that all the kids talk about is themselves. (Later when I asked D20 about this she said that she doesn't want to talk to Mom about OM or anything else so she just talks about herself).

We talked a little bit more and then we were on our separate ways. She will be gone in two weeks and I'm not sure if I'll see her again before she leaves or not. She did send me her "proposal" for dividing the furniture on Saturday and I am now working on my reply to that. I will post her e-mail shortly and then will post mine later looking for feedback.