She Say's She Want's Out Of The Marriage

[steady]

Sorry tbart. I've not been here in a few days - definitely didn't forget about you. I had the kids this weekend and didn't fire up my computer at all.

Now my take on it all...

Drop all notions and guessing about what's positive and what's negative. This is how we get all wrapped around the axle.

Just re-read your thread from the beginning and you'll see what I'm talking about. When things 'appear' (and I use appear very loosely because it's our interpretation of how now will affect the future that creates the appearance) to be going our way we get up. When they 'appear' to be going opposite of where we think it should go, then we go down.

Read the Zen story I posted a bit back in this thread. You have to keep that in the forefront of your mind.

Otherwise, she will say or do something which you'll interpret as a backslide or reversal and start to panic. Again, just read back and count how many times you were upset that things appeared to be going poorly.

Now look where you are.

We are always deceived by appearances. Embrace anything that happens with the full knowledge you have no idea where anything is going. It's our need to control people and our environment which cause us to compulsively try to guess the future. It's impossible. I've never met anyone who could do it. They may have guessed correctly sometimes, but I'll bet good money they were wrong most of the time.

Now, with that being said. Focus on you and the kids. Your mind will start to wonder what she's doing and thinking while she is in the rental and you are at home. You will have a desire to snoop or to sit and ruminate trying to figure out where everything is going.

It's going where it's going, and you won't know what that is until you get there.

Keep doing what you're doing .... except for anything you may be doing 'wrong'...

(That last line was a joke)