Thank you my friend! I will pass along all the b-day wishes to little man.
In answer to the question you and Tristan posed...We haven't even made it to court yet...The 2 times we have gotten close, he has filed motions to stall so no he hasn't been made to pay a single dime yet. Only consulation I have is he will be made to pay back support from 07/10/09 and it will automatically be taken from his check before he even sees a dime.
Originally Posted By: SpyBunny
And I understand that moment of entertaining the thought of walking away without him paying a dime, I had the same thought myself recently.
Funny...
When I first started I was desperate for him to return, now I am desperate for my life to be given back to me, and while doing this would be the easiest way, I am no longer about the easy way...
The fight is what gives me the Faith to make the right decisions...
Each little nail he puts in that coffin gives me the strength I need to make sure I do what is right for me and my boys...
It may have started out all about him, however it is now all about us.
May All Who Seek To Take My Life Be Put To Shame And Confusion; May All Who Desire My Ruin Be Turned Back In Disgrace. ~Psalm 40:14~
H came today to pick up little man and spend a few hours with him since he didn't see him on his b-day...
I went to Church as little man went off to have fun with the Disneyland Dad...
Went to lunch and then a place kinda like Sea World (no comment on whether he was visiting the whale of the OW)
I got home first and they arrived about 30 minutes after me...
Saw older son walking up the driveway however little man didn't look happy at all..
Asked him what was wrong and he wouldn't answer me at first...
I went to ask H if he had been sick or acting "off" during their time together...
H said nope...S was a bit mouthy however (WTHever)...
So little man comes down the driveway and starts talking to H..Tells him to tell me why he is never living with us again...Why he left, why older S isn't ever coming back...
H is ignoring him and I turned to H and said aren't you going to address him, he is speaking to you...
H says we took care of that at lunch...*Breaks slamming* Who is "we"? I asked...
Older S explained to him what was going on...WTF?
I said You Did What? He said he had older S explain what was going on between H and I, in kid speak so little man would understand...
Let me get this straight...You wanted a D, I served you, you refused to sign the papers, gave them back to me on Mother's Day no less and now you have our 14 year old S do your dirty work with our 7 year old?
Yep - With a smug smile
My little man stood there with tears in his eyes and I looked back between H and S...Back and forth for a good 2 full minutes without speaking...Then I took my sons' hand, put a smile on my face and stood up a little taller as I uttered 2 words I swore I would never say in front of my children...
F*****G P***K
Then S and I turned and walked away.
I have stood back for almost 16 months and never disrespected him in front of them nor to them...I have never bad mouthed him nor cursed him...
My son cried for almost 2 straight hours after H left wondering why his Dad didn't want to live with him ever again and why his Dad and Brother treated him like crap today...
I have no answer for that.
I don't see any reason why I can't just punch him in the throat as I walk away, however I am trying to be the better person here.
Amazing how low he will stoop in order to not own his own S**T.
((((Hugs)))
May All Who Seek To Take My Life Be Put To Shame And Confusion; May All Who Desire My Ruin Be Turned Back In Disgrace. ~Psalm 40:14~
(((Serenity))) My heart beaks for both your little men.
But they've got one hell of a mother. So they will be alright. You are and will continue to be alright. Eventually this will all be a dim, distant memory.
Gardener
"My soul, be satisfied with flowers, With fruit, with weeds even; but gather them In the one garden you may call your own." Cyrano deBergerac
Serenity, My god - what a terrible scene. Please do what you can to help your sons - get some external help with the 'best way' to frame this situation for your children so that they don't internalize and personalize it. I'm so sorry for you and your children and I'm very sorry for your husband - his heart must be pretty closed off.
A
M - 46 H - 47 T - 20 yrs M - 19 yrs DS 7yrs DS 6yrs DD 4 yrs Bomb - 4/3/10 My Sitch
I sat outside this morning before anyone got up and started going through the past year and it is almost like a bad dream that you just can't quite wake up from...
Like I am standing outside of my body, watching the walls crumble all around me, however it isn't really a bad thing...
I wasn't crying, I wasn't overwhelmed...
I was calm and at peace.
Acceptance is a powerful thing.
May All Who Seek To Take My Life Be Put To Shame And Confusion; May All Who Desire My Ruin Be Turned Back In Disgrace. ~Psalm 40:14~
