MY SITUATION

[sandi2]

Well if your W "hates" everyone in her life, then it sounds like she has some serious issues. Has she ever been to counseling? BTW, I hope she doesn't express how she hates her kids to them. What does her parents say about her attitude?

Her wanting to move to another city in order to be happy is her way of running from problems. She seems a bit old not to be more mature than this.

In my opinion, I think you are going to have to use tough love with this woman or she will bully you to no end. In fact, I will just come out and tell you that she has no respect for you and probably has lost her sexual attraction for you. That is usually what happens when a woman is ready to walk out.

Her comment about you being gay may be saying more that she sees you playing the part of the woman more than a man. I do not mean to sound ugly about this, but I just talk plain and hope you'll accept it without offense.

I know that in most homes where both partners work, that the H shares the housework and helping with children. However, from what you said that you do, I wonder what is left for her. What is her part of the responsibilities? Whenever the H is doing everything around the house, including everything with caring for the kids,then the woman will more than likely began to see him as being more feminine than masculine. She may began dictating to him, calling the shots about everything, and soon has become a bully leading him around by the nose.

Truth be known, a woman doesn't want to be able to run over her H, but she will test him to see how much he'll take. She will push him to the very limit just to see how much she can get away with. Some women may not admit t....but they will do it at some point.....and some do it more than others. However, a woman wants a man who she cannot boss around. She wants him to stand up to her and act manly. She wants a man she can respect. She wants a man who shows strength of character and leadership. She wants to depend on him as the leader & protector of the home.

My H helps with housework also. But he never lets me forget that he's manly about it. It's rather hard for me to explain to a man how he is to appear manly, and you may be as manly as they come.....but I suspect somewhere in trying to keep the peace around the home, you've taken a back seat and let your W roughshod you into acting more like the wifey.

I lost respect for my H and it was nothing but simple things like him not being as good of a provider as I thought he should be, so I recognize those factors. That is a point from where other problems build.

Have you read the Divorce Remedy book? If not, I suggest you get that and read ASAP. In the meantime, read the other threads here on the board, and come back to post everyday possible.