I have gotten the talk from my wife and know that she is having a affair, She keeps telling everyone we are having problems but that is it.About 15% of the people we know know what is going on.Should I make it public that my wife wants to leave me?Should I tell everyone that she has a boyfriend and she is sleeping with him,One of my former friends.I need some help on this.I feel like I am the bad guy now and all I am trying to do is to be a good dad to my kids in these hard times.She is the one staying out late and coming home drunk.Anyone had this problem before?
Things got a lot better and I thought that I saved our marrage. But things lately have gotten worse I almost lost my job and had a bad month.She started drifting and staying out about 2 weeks ago. No other man is not married.
If things got a lot better b/c you made wonderful changes in yourself but then stopped improving and fell back into old patterns.....that's where you messed up. However, if she never stopped making contact with OM from the previous A, that's the problem.
You said he had been a friend of yours. Is he still in the "circle" of friends that you & W socialize with, or was he completely cut out of sight & sound?
I will let Puppy explain about the exposure, but I'm thinking that it is going to take a whole lot of tough love (boundary setting/enforcing) along with it. Exposure is a critical step but you've got to have these other things ready to put into place, too.
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
You are exactly right I did the changes but fell into old and very bad habits.Yes he is still in the circle and I am out.Everyone is very happy for both of them that is in our circle.I think. Nobody has called me but one friend to check on me.So I think it is OVER.
Others are happy for them? Does that mean she & OM have made it officially known they are a couple? That seems a lot to happen in a couple of weeks. Must have been going on longer.
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
If your circle of friends know about W & OM, then why haven't you packed her things and set out by the street? She should not be allowed to come & go as if she still holds the respected place of wife in the home.
I know, you are going to say something about your kids....but this is not what they need, and you need to make some swift and drastic moves.
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
This has all come to a head since last Friday.My wife told me they have been talking for a month.Yes our inner circle has found out alot in a week and alot has happened in a week.I have been at work when this has been going on.Ever feel like you lost everything? I am very alone right now.What do you do?How do you pass the time?
