It seems you have made good progress with your job and finances so I say why not go back to the house. If she doesn't trust the two of you can afford it, well, no problem! If you trust in yourself that you can afford it that is a huge plus for many reasons. It will get you out of your parents house, allow you to keep your house instead of trying to buy another one (might not be easy in this economy with a 2 yr gap in employment) and honestly might help garner some trust with your W and your ability to support owning a a a home on your own.
I sense you are afraid any action on your part will make your W angry and that is not a good way to live.
Sometimes you have to work with what is in front of you and right now the "material" you have to work with is an empty house, a solution from the bank to keep the house and a W that is not in a place to work in the R. What is best for you life now?
I would simply say: W, now that I have secured a good paying job and have explored my options with the bank I have decided to move back in the house on X date.
