Of course he feels pain. Why do you think he is doing what he is doing? Because it's fun??? There is nothing fun about divorce for anyone.
i still don't buy it. i honestly do not feel that he's in any pain. he's doing it for his parents. so they can be proud of him. they are well-versed in divorce and using spineless tactics like that. it's what they do best. and then they stand back and say "we're just innocent people who wouldn't harm a fly." "we're not that kind of people yet why is the world so unfair to us?" yknow why? cuz karma is a b*tch.
i do believe he thinks it's fun. if it hurt so much, he would want this over quickly. i've said all along. if he wants out, then get out!
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But it's not time for forgiveness yet for you. You have much work to continue doing prior to that. But I do recommend you start now since it does take a while and a lot of effort.
i feel like i'm back to square one. i don't know what work i am supposed to do. what am i supposed to work on? detachment? i'm trying to pre-occupy myself with stuff and not think about h. and then the financial statement come in and i have to focus on that again.
when i lost it last week, it was almost as if i knew that something coming around the corner. and then it did.
lost sleep. couldn't eat.
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Keep in mind he will do all kinds of nasty things. The money? He'll try to be as selfish as he can and likely use anger to help him feel justified. It's normal for humans to do that, right? Don't be surprised by it.
it doesn't make it okay. it's been really disappointing to watch someone do that. i don't feel sorry for him because he brought on this anger himself. i didn't trigger it - as much as i like to dig into him.
