"i need to speak with my L."

Yup.

"i see a lot of padding in the financial statements. padding to work in his favor."

This is normal as Coach said.

"i need to see a doctor.
my anxiety is getting out of hand."

Do this first. Be honest with the Doc.. explain the situation and what you are going thru.

"my mother is recommending that i go home this weekend.
i don't even know if i'm able to drive."

Don't drive then. Take a cab.. a train.. what ever.

Sleeping..and eating are important. More than you think.

Don't react to this right now.

Relax
Eat
Think
Act normal
React.. Smartly.
Do something different.
Emulate.
Do Work.

Lets get "RETARDED" in here.