Hey G. Another 5am insomnia moment here :-) Good to find you!
He could rebel for the sake of rebelling, true. I have no expectations today so he can rebel if he likes, I don't care.
The name: We were always going to double-barrel anyway. WH and I always believed our child should have both our names, as a political statement more than anything. We wanted to break with tradition. Kinda makes it easier to just stick with that plan... Maybe that's a lame excuse. Lame excuse #2 is that it sounds better double-barrelled cos my surname is really boring, and there's no way she is just having his! Other reason is that I don't want to upset his family over a matter that is just not central to me (although none of them share his name which he has from his walk-away father whom he only met 3 times in his life). Other thing is, the child can always unbarrel the name, as as mine comes last, she could easily just take on my surname alone.
I agree though that it does just sound like I am giving him what he wants, but oh well.. I toyed with the idea of adding a line like "For reasons which are entirely my own, I agree that we should give her our shared family names". But it seems a bit petty.
As for him not seeing her for a while -- no, happy for him to meet her when it is practicable. I figure in the couple of hours after the birth, I might be busy recovering/bonding/god knows what else - sleeping perhaps? - and I think he should come after that. I am putting my well-being and that of the baby's first.
If he doesn't want to see me give birth, then he can come in when 'the mess is cleaned up' (!), just like everyone else in the extended family...although he can probably have first dibs being the biological father and all.
About the MLC stuff, I don't think he has depression.. I could be wrong though, as I understand it doesn't always present as 'classic depression'. Would be interested in reading these threads.
