Thanks you guys. I'm going to have to figure out how to talk about it very carefully. It's a real fine line, because he still has a tendancy to get a rebellious teenager attitude on such subjects. On the other hand, if he really hears the pain all of that caused me for so long, he will probably feel genuine remorse and choose to make an offering of changing old behavior.
Other update: Cell phone company guy called back and left a message that my old cell phone was disconnected in February. WHEW!
I'm glad about the cell phone thing! I understand you have to pick your words wisely-It matters very much how you approach them. They can get defensive which I don't really understand but they do nonetheless. I think it's that they want us to trust them and get frustrated at how long it actually takes us. We think they should understand why it does, and they think WE should understand that they are genuine. It IS a fine line. Your right to pick your words wisely Tal. I'm sure he'll be understanding. Rachael
Hmmmm...do you want him NOT to get the computer hook up or just want to air your feelings?
Remember last summer when CJ and I had a bit of an argument because he thought we could both share my computer while he took his on-line course?
I was the one who suggested the laptop with the remote internet hook-up!!!
Have I had a few "moments" when he's on there for hours on end? Yes. ...but honestly, Tal, it's never really been a big issue for ME.
Even though he hooked up with BOTH OW in on-line chat rooms.
I just decided to trust him, to let him know I supported his efforts (the computer was bought so he could take these courses and we could NOT have survived without it!).
I'm not recommending anything, just relating my experience.
Tal~ Glad to hear about the cell phone! WOOHEE! What a relief! Thanks for dropping by and giving me support. Sometimes I loose it! The closer H gets to me the harder it gets!
I know I will have trouble with the trust thing just like you! Hang in there eventually we relax!
Quote: Note: we are turning one of our upstairs rooms into an office. He is looking for a used computer because he says he wants to write stories, but also wants a wireless setup to access the internet.
very simple, get a laptop from ebay, with the wireless access, then he can sit beside you, write his book, and surf.
If you need details on how to do it, go to my page for my email. Mention divorce busting, so I know it is not spam.
Hey Poe, I've got the wireless connection already but haven't hooked it up. I've done the Ebay thing quite a bit, and we've been looking for a laptop, but I've been a little wary of getting one off of ebay. Have you had any good luck with that?
Hi LL...one of the things I was also going to mention echoes Poe's post. One of the big pluses of the laptop wireless deal is that CJ works right on the couch in the living room.
I've dusted around him, I'm usually within a few feet (if I'm in the room!) and frankly it's MUCH better than having him holed up in the basement. (Nope, I've never even snuck a peek! )
...but honestly, Tal, it's never really been a big issue for ME.
)