COULD pup, but in THIS case I would just leave it alone and let her figure that out.
OIN's wife seems to want to pin problems on OIN instead of owning them herself.
I think if he isnt' THERE in the ROOM to BLAME, she HAS to eventually own it and fix it herself.
Its common to blame someone nearby when a problem happens... It keeps you from beating yourself up.
OIN, just leave her alone with her problems.. that emotional tension she has to experience for the mess is GROWTH... she WILL grow from it if you leave her alone.
If you try to fix it you are just bailing her out and she learns nothing.. It's basic parenting...
And yes, in my opinion we don't just parent our children, we parent our spouses too.
GOOD parenting means leaving them to clean their messes up.. BAD parenting is cleaning it up for them.
