Atta girl Tal! Keep coming here to vent and put a voice to your insecurities and fears of betrayal. The people on this BB WANT you to succeed-your SO close. I know it IS hard for anyone, and I think your right-especially those of us that were abandoned or betrayed as children. We have deep seated issues that come out full throttle when the ones we think we can trust the most betray us. The thing is- they have issues too. Its obvious by their actions. We know in our heart that this is not really who they are when they are in that tunnel. That's what keeps us going and hanging on. The thing is, they come out-at least most of them eventually do,and those of us who hang in there long enough finally see them start to come out and attempt to make amends. The hardest thing for us to do is trust again, but we HAVE to. Yes,it's a risk, but one we have to take if we want our lives back with our S. They messed up big time. We are not the only ones that have to live with that. They do too. The hardest thing they have to do is forgive themselves. I know because I was a WAS several yrs back. I never dreamed my H would go through a harder time than me. And for SO LONG! When I came to my senses I could actually feel how badly I had hurt my H. There was NOTHING I could do to reverse the damage I had done. All I could do was love him as best I knew how and promised him I would never leave him or cheat on him again. I never did. I never will. We are giving our H unconditional love by taking them back and loving them despite what they have put us through. Would we ever stop loving our children no matter what they did? We have unconditional love for them. I have the same for my H. He knows that now. No one can come between us unless we let them Tal. We will watch out for each other as we know there will be those times we will have to come here and lay our fears out on the table. We have not come this far to fail now........Rachael
