still separated, headed for D?

[newmama]

I am glad that you are not overreacting from your husband being polite. That was very hard for me to do.

4luv, I have been there done that! Believe me, up until 3 weeks ago I was getting all excited to see his polite and bubbly texts about S with !s even though he still was with OW! DUH! And his texts haven't really changed in tone even during my 3 weeks of being dim. I am tempted to analyze that, but at the same time I am exhausted of looking for little insignificant signs of hope. I need a big ol' "Let's talk about R" sign!

My hunch though, is that he is "waiting" for my old newmama self to return and he doesn't buy the 180s I am putting in place.

I am proud of myself for staying dim. When I am angry it is easy. When I am sad or happy it is hard...because if I am in a good mood I want to be chatty with WH when I see him. Still, I visualize myself having magnetic energy and he feels pulled toward me. I revisit my positive thinking plan. I meditate and picture discussion of R. I pray for clarity to know how to respond and what to do to pull WH toward me, for will power to stick to my plan, and patience for hanging in there and not filing D. I also pray that WH will see OW's true colors and he will realize he wants a family with me.

WN- we must have been on the same wavelength because on my drive home, I was thinking of using my next session to discuss conditions for R with my IC. (He was our MC for a couple of sessions)

I meant to add that I would want WH to get a transfer so he wouldn't be in the same building as OW. But he does work in a very large building. And transfers only come up so often.