still separated, headed for D?

[newmama]

Hi! I just got back and will catch up on threads when S goes to bed!

About the ultimatum- yes it was a "what if" scenario. You know I think I might have disagree about not applying pressure here...you see I was talking about if he said to me that he is thinking of reconciling and wants to, but he has not ended it with her, then how is it that much different than the limbo I was in for a year? How would he be motivated to end if I just said "I want to R if you end it." and then he goes on for months with her? and I suffer more and at this point how would he ever respect me again or believe my word if I just keep showing him that NO MATTER WHAT HE DOES I will be there? Do you get what I mean?

I know this is all hypothetical but hey, it could happen and I want to be prepared!