(((DU))) Sorry you are struggling. I just wanted to add FWIW that I think it is okay to express displeasure even to God, He can take it.:) This MLC thing rocks us to our cores - it takes away just about every security or illusion of security we thought we had with our spouse.
Personally for me, my faith has grown so much in the past year and is stronger than it has ever been, BUT that being said, I have had a lot of moments where I have literally SCREAMED at God about how unfair it is, why isn't He stepping in and changing things, etc. I think that is okay - He knows what is on our hearts anyway, whether we say it (or scream it:))or not. And I still have moments like that sometimes. It is cathartic actually.
I don't know what else you have going on right now, but it does take time to work through the grief and sadness and the loss of what we thought we had. It DOES get better.
