Question

[awest1217]

Some interesting things about last night. H came over because S wanted to call and ask him. H was excited about getting some free teaching supplies and some little things for S. I forgot to change back to my wedding ring so H noticed I wasn't wearing it and asked about it. Luckily, a prong is broke so I told him I didn't want to wear it and lose the diamond. He asked if I wanted to get it fixed and I said it depends on if we are going to stay together. He didn't say anything to that. Him not talking is really making me mad. He looked a little hurt, but didn't say yes I want to stay with you so you should get it fixed or give it to me, I want to get it fixed for you and will give it back to you when I come home...nothing.

Other things, he left his ipod on the side table and I just couldn't resist but to look through it. I know I shouldn't and have been so good, but I just needed to know. The pics of OW are no longer on there, but neither are any pics of me. There was no sign of IM's from OW, e-mails, FB messages, anything. It is like she was really just an friend again. When I looked at the FB stuff, there was a message to my brother-in-law from March. I didn't get to read it all, but mostly it talked about how we had hurt each other and how he didn't want to lose me or S, but didn't know what to do. My BIL a year and a half ago told my sister that he was having an A and wanted to leave her. He never left, but talked about it. Now they have a really great marriage. My BIL said it is a hard thing to do, but can be done and said he preferred to talk and gave H his number. I don't know if H ever called BIL and I don't want to ask, but that was in March before the rehab.

S asked H about coming over today and he said he was busy. Then he asked about Friday and H said he wanted to go back down to rehab because he has 3 more sessions. He also talked about cleaning stuff out of his parents, but I don't know what that means. I am planning on writing H an e-mail this week to send him either this weekend or next week. I feel like he is just out of reach...we are so close to reconciling, but yet there is a huge valley between us.

Who knows what will happen, but I have to at least let H knwo how I feel.