This may come off as me being just upset with the world. I have been away from these boards for a couple of weeks and a lot has happened. I thought things were okay, but they are slowly unraveling because I do not believe that I will be okay, things won't get better, marriages end because of the will of God (even thought he supposedly hates divorce), and that the life of a person who has tried to do good is not worth the interest of a God who wants us to believe in him. Why is the world so unjust? Why do we invoke the idea of God when things go wrong in our lives? Why does God forsake those who have already suffered significant pain (even that beyond the experience of having a spouse who walks away)?
I know, I seem bitter and I am. John tells us that, "If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness." (I Jn. 1:9). It is "supposedly" our responsibility to do our very best to live a sinless life, and when we sin I must repent and CONFESS sins to God. If we choose not to do so, then we are being a disobedient child, and God will rebuke and chasten us.
I am very much distrustful of all people who claim they "love" me. What do those words really mean? Do they know what it says to those who use it? How can God allow a spouse who made a vow before God to walk away? Please don't tell me about free will. Free will is just something we say he gives people to continue to believe a deity that controls the will of men. There is nothing that happens in life that is not first permitted by God.
It is said that "for God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believeth in him shall not perish but have eternal life" (John 3:16). Why is there contingency in God's word? We must first belive in him to endure happiness and eternity?
A LOT has happened to me since my last posting. In the mind of those who do believe in God and his word, I am not worthy and maybe this journey that is heading towards depair, pain, a diseased body, and a life alone is my destiny. It is no longer unknown....
OLD THREAD-http://tinyurl.com/y98nuty Me 44 H 51 T 15 yrs M 9+ yrs No Kids "You may be deceived if you trust too much, but you will live in torment unless you trust enough."
