Whatever you are doing is working to a point. There is just something there that tells me that. I don't know a whole lot.. but I trust my gut.
At times I feel like you are hiding.. and I keep wanting you to step out more. The "theme" in all your posts is almost.. mysterious. It is like you think things.. but don't act on them. From what I have seen.. I think your gut is pretty smart. Living in the house with someone that wants to leave.. and your still not "going crazy".. that is good stuff. Trust me.. I was in your shoes and was failing miserably! It takes a lot of heart to do just that! That is what is so appealing to me.. and why I keep posting. I tend to harp on things.. usually it is the things I "see". I point them out in as many creative ways as I can. Sometimes I feel like a broken record.
"I seem to be able to pick out when I am the broke GPS pretty easily, still working on avoiding it altogether."
To a point.. you will never avoid it. Life just is that way. Construction.. closed roads.. floods.. hurricanes.. they all get in the way. I don't want you to avoid it.. that is not the goal.
I want you to be "prepared" enough to "see" it coming.
If we take my GPS idea and expand on it.. the only reason it can function is because it "knows" all the routes. Someone sat down and figured it all out.. and stored it to memory. The GPS is not smarter than you.. it just knows "everywhere" you can go. It was prepared to redirect you. It just did it because it does not have any thoughts.. other than getting you "home".
Expect the wrong turns.. they are gonna happen. Expect not knowing for a while.. what is the best route.
That is what makes "life" fun.
"Firm, not angry. I need to verbalize it. My steaming silence lets him interpret (and he never gets it right)."
Yes!! In case you missed it.. YES!!!!!
You even pointed out.. he can see you steaming!
What else would he think?
I know.. he was supposed to come give you a hug.. and tell you everything was gonna be alright. He was stupid.. and you were right.
Right now.. this moment.. you are in a battle for control! It is that simple. PICK YOUR BATTLES! If you need time to think.. ask for it! If you need to talk.. think about it for 48 hours and decide if you really need to talk. Make him chase you around the house wanting to talk.. you will see yourself in it.
"That, right there, just about sums up my position on all of this! I don't want to hear him talk about our R because he isn't going to convince me he's right, but he just might convince himself!"
He already convinced himself.. he said the words. You understood them. You realized that this is not what you want. Every action.. should show him this is not want you want. What you say.. will most likely fall on deaf ears.
Do Work
don't
Talk Work
As you can "see" the latter just does not leave that lasting impression!
Now.. Again..
Relax Eat Think Act normal React.. Smartly. Do something different. Emulate. Do Work.
