the easy answer i can find in my head and my heart right now is love.

i don't have fear of being alone or not finding someone or anything like that.
i am strong and (usually wink ) smart, i'm told i'm beautiful. i have a good job. i have a house, a car, my dog. i'm financially ok.

i'm sure that people who have been in therapy or therapists themselves will say i have deep resounding issues because of my parents, because of my family's history of divorce, because of my own divorce (ok, that last one I give in and admit. but really, i've talked about it and there is no easy way to fix those wounds that open so easily. the words left such deep and lifethreatening tears)


my easy answer/defense is that i am a hopeless romantic. i've watched too much tv & movies. i can't kill the hope, no matter how much level headed reason i've got to combat it.


i agree with everyone about everything. if this was my friend or my daughter (hypothetical) i would want them to get out, run as fast as they could in the opposite direction.
but honestly, the advice that would come out of my mouth would be to follow their heart. make their decision for themselves.

my heart is in the process of breaking, but not giving in.
hell - nothing to give in to. it's not like he's fighting or begging to stay. and that speaks louder than an opera singer with a megaphone.

Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn't do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover.