What were the main points you should have been listening to?
Sorry, DLS. I don't get the question. If you mean should I listen to what everyone has said, including me, about not leaving the house, I know. Just venting.
If you couldn't tell, I'm really mad right now. Mad is good sometimes. I just have to control it.
I gotta go with you there, IDU. It isn't a court of law, so once you feel the 'burden of proof' has met YOUR standard, It's time. Hang in there man, it's tough.
Life may be short, but . . . well . . . it actually IS short, now that I think about it . . . . particularly when compared to planetary formation and stuff.
Are people saying you shouldn't leave the house even for a night? What I got from reading most of your pages was "don't walk out" as in 'for a new apartment' or something. It seems to me that that wouldn't be expected at this point. And heck just say . . . "had a meeting last night, went long" . . . keep in mind I'm a cabinetmaker, not a relationship expert . . . just ask everyone here :^)
I'll have to go back over your thread IDU, I might be mixing some of the threads, I've read so many and feel for ya'll. Been there, so I know how it feels. Be strong, be cool. Rootin for ya man.
Life may be short, but . . . well . . . it actually IS short, now that I think about it . . . . particularly when compared to planetary formation and stuff.
I appreciate all the support today. It really helped me. I am sorry to see you with some frustration after the great last few days you had. It is hard to always be that detached all the time, but I think is happen more and more as time goes on. I sure hope so for my sake.
Do what you think is best.
I applaud you for keeping it together and doing what is best for you.
ME-41 W-33 M-8 D-8 S-4 D 5/17/2010 www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=1961097#Post1961097
Talked to BIL and M & FIL last night. They all support me and want W to stop what she's doing and save the M. I told them all, and they agreed, that the only thing that will maybe wake her up is realizing she has nowhere to go and no money. I asked that they not enable her if she decides to leave. They told me not to leave the house or the kids and if she decides to leave, she will not be welcome in any of their homes. She will have to make it on her own.
I understand this may change at any given moment. She is their daughter and sister. It did make me feel a little better to know I wasn't fighting against them. She does have two sisters, one who she talks to often that I wonder if she is saying, yes, get rid of him, go, you deserve better. BIL assures me that is not the case. We'll see.
(((IDU))) you sound really strong. I know this is hard but you sound like you're up for it
me: 42 | STBXH: 41 | T: 18 | M: 10 | separation: Jan 3, 2010 | they deserve better: S7 & D4 current thread: http://tinyurl.com/3y8sxcp .: first breathe, then heal, then start LIVING :.
I am up for it. I do have my moments of weakness and doubt, as you can tell. When I do, I come here, let it out, calm down and go on with what I need to do.
I'm at a place I could only dream of a couple of months ago. She would have to work to get me back. Before, I prayed and dreamed of her waking up and I would welcome her back with open arms and all would be forgiven. Now, there is no way I would be that stupid. Screw me once, shame on you. Screw me twice, shame on me.
She's done it more that twice. What can I say? I'm a FAST learner!
It feels good to finally have a plan after all this time. I know I was in denial even after reading so much on here and being told to snoop and gather evidence. I still don't understand the boldness of her bringing him around her family and her family not saying anything. After I asked them, they didn't deny it, but still. Oh, well. Now I know for sure. I also know her ability to lie knows no bounds.
Still hard to accept. It makes doing what need to be done much easier.
