need help with communication/DB strategy

[Piano]

FLC, good to see you're getting some help and some support here. Thanks for your kind comments. I am none of the things you say - just love my H, think he's currently behaving like a drongo and well, a bit of a loser really, and have been desperately sad about losing him and my life that went with it. And I'm peeved about raising a child alone. Sheez! Anyways, I think I am reaching 'letting go' stage, but every time I get there I seem to backpeddle and mess up!! Oh well, gotta hang in there :-)

I can understand how pained you would be by your H's reaction to your miscarriage, and I hope he wasn't mean or spiteful when he shared his 'relief' about it with you... I am hoping he was just being 'honest'.

Asking about the existence of OW rarely yields the truth. People in affairs LIE. That's why a lot of the advice around here is to do some independent snooping in order to find out if there is an OW or not. When in doubt, the advice then goes better to assumer that there could be an affair taking place, but NO MORE talking about it with him! You are shooting blanks if you have no proof.

Having an 'international' (so therefore long distance sometimes) relationship myself, I know what distance can do to two people, and too much at the wrong time is a relationship killer. No matter how good your marriage is. If you both put work ahead of each other, then that could be the problem. In fact, I think that is most likely the problem here....

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I'll try to post some advice which I archived on my computre for easy reference. I hope they help give you some ways to approach your situation...