You two are not alone. This is a factor in my situation, too. It's not fair that they support your work but then use the time it took you to achieve whatever it was against you.
The twisted thing is that last year, when I was working a lot, I had a tremendous amount of energy, because achieving my goal at work would also clear one more obstacle on the path to our getting together (by making me more eligible for other jobs, etc). Now, that I have a bit more time, I have no real desire to plow on. Don't get me wrong, I love what I do (I teach--yeah, Number 8, even that we have in common), and I know the passion will come back, but right now I feel no pull towards my work...Sigh...
I've gone through a lull with mine at times since we separated, too, but I also love being at work because I barely have time to think about H. H has job-hopped so much that he doesn't understand someone really enjoying what they do, spending time thinking about it and planning, evaluating assessments and data, or telling all the crazy things that happened during the day (and there are plenty of those to tell).
The good news is that you have an education and a career, and it's a good career. If you have to do this on your own, then you CAN. I hope you (and I) don't have to, but we CAN.
