To answer your question, I would say that your H is in MLC.
That is why you post over here, because you think that.
MLC=Confusion
Your H has shown you his confusion time and again.
Of course it is your fault that he will not can’t move home with the children. Why on earth would it be his fault?
Second, even with the things that you are doing to live right now, I have seen a ton of focus still on your H, his actions, and his feelings…
It is time, and it is really obvious to me and others, to shift the focus from your H to you…
You let his words and actions confuse and hurt you…
They stop you in your progress…
You have heard some good things “the candle lit” thing for one.
It is not a guarantee of much, but it is a positive comment.
However, because you are still doing the dance with him, you are allowing yourself to be put in the position you are in…
So now you are hurt all over by his actions…
Seeking is right, if you had taken up residence together, he would probably be on his way back out of the door, and THAT would not have been your fault, but his choice. Because he is still very very uncertain of anything in his life right now.
I would suggest that you take some more time, learn about MLC some more (have you done that yet?), read the archives, read about pursuit and detatchment. Then APPLY what you have read and learned. Really apply it.
Some very hard questions have been asked of you in the last week, that you haven’t answered. The answers aren’t necessary for us, but they are necessary for you or you are going to continue to spin.
Originally Posted By: Mach1
Sometimes...words are just that....words
What are his actions saying ?
You H can say whatever he wants, including that your skin is purple and that you are from the country of Jacklandia, however that does not make it true…
"Acceptance doesn't mean resignation. It means understanding that something is what it is and there's got to be a way through it."--Michael J. Fox
