You aren't forcing her out if you are inviting the non-cheating wife back in...
This is sort of like an exorcism :
Out with the bad, in with the good.
You aren't just tossing her out because she cheated, you are asking her to come BACK when she STOPS...
Look at it like a time out you might give a child... you aren't throwing the child out as much as you are restricting their access to you and their family while they are being destructive.
As long as you keep inviting her to family therapy, warning her infidelity harms children, and that divorce harms children, and lastly that you want to work on your marriage with a FT, SHE is LEAVING then... you are giving her all these options if she wants to stay and making things inviting as possible.
if she rejects all of the family therapy, the warnigns about harming children, etc and remains separated then she is choosing to separate and do harm to everyone around her... which you are acting to minimize...
She is welcome back at any time.. so its not a throw out.. its a TIME OUT.
