still separated, headed for D?

[newmama]

Thank you Piano and Gatsby! Whatnow, I forgot to tell you that I am sorry you have been sad as well and I do hope you are right that it is the moon because that means it will end soon (the phase).

I confess that I am wearing my workout clothes but have ZERO desire to work out! I do feel confident that when I wake up tomorrow, I will be refreshed. I have not pigged out (although a brownie sundae with real hot fudge sauce sounds heavenly) but I have drank alcohol which has lots of calories (as well as eating regular food). So I guess I won't weigh myself for another week,lol!

Gatsby- the special friend is still around, and actually today he helped me kind of feel comforted in a possibility...

You see I noticed that in the last couple weeks or so when I have asked WH if I could switch this day or that regarding visitation with S, he has said "SURE" right away. In the past, he would say "let me get back to you."

I just was mentioning this to my friend and I said that it stood out to me but I don't know why.He said he suspects it does reflect a change in the relationship between WH and OW meaning before he would put OW's needs first. Now, probably due to guilt, he is putting my needs first. (well- regarding the schedule!)

This led into a discussion about how WH was genuinely shocked when he told me in April that he wanted a D that I wanted to change the way he visited S and how I had plans drafted when he told me he wanted to D. He said "wow, you've been thinking about this!" (SORRY FOR REPEATING MYSELF!!!!)

Since then, I have been withdrawn and polite but not my "newmama" self with WH. SOOOOO my friend said he suspects WH feels some resentment toward OW for pressuring him to D which resulted in him losing the comfy cake eating set up he had with me, requiring S to go back and forth 4 times per week, and losing my friendship.

I think there could be a flow chart that could show cause and effect here and it is based on MIND READING but when I talked to my g-ma tonight she surprised me by saying "Oh I am SURE he resents OW!!! Don't you think men, or anyone for that matter, resent people for pressuring them into something?"

Now I realize that this is allllll speculation and who knows if OW was the one who pushed WH to make a decision or if it came from WH. But my gut tells me she had a big role and I think common sense does too!

No matter. WH goes out of town tomorrow until Thursday, then picks up S, returns him on Saturday, and his b-day is Sunday. Surely he won't have time to work on the paperwork this week....