Is it stupid to give up cell phone viewing rights?

[amg2]

I wanted to update this thread for anyone else who might be wondering about whether to stop looking at cell records or not. For me, I had spent 3 months poring over cell records online, going back 6 months, comparing dates/calls/texts/and internet activity from the phone. I was also closely watching his email and credit card statement online during this time. I was wearing myself out physically and mentally and actually missed work twice ALMOST SOLELY due to logging on in the morning and seeing something upsetting.

A week ago I accepted that I had seen enough. I know he's still hiding something. I don't know what it is. It could be big--or small. But what I DO know is that he's not working on our M much (if at all) and is still continuing to lie in some capacity. And that's all I need to know. So when I accepted this a week ago, I asked my friend to change the password to the online cell access. I was nervous...what would I do with out this info?

What has happened in my case is that it's been the best thing I've done in the 3 months since this happened. Not only am I not looking at the cell recs, I've also NOT LOGGED INTO his email one time (though I still know that password and can't change it) and have virtually stopped looking at the credit card statement online too. I'll see the bill when it shows up--I don't need to spend my time looking at it daily.

I know I could't have given up the cell recs until I was ready. Until I could see that I didn't need to know more. Until I could see that looking at them was "keeping me off my game" as Puppy put it. I'll admit I do wonder about them from time to time (it's only been one week). But the "unburdening" benefits of not seeing them have FAR outweighed the benefits of anything I'd see there.

If you are in a situation like mine, and find yourself wondering about stopping looking at the records, I highly recommend you give it a try WHEN YOU FEEL READY. For me, once I 'knew enough' and was wondering if looking at the records what hurting more than helping, that was the time.

Hope this helps someone.