I can't get mine to stay on the phone with me for more than 5 mins unless we are talkiing about the weather!!!!
CW,
Have you tried ending the conversation first?
I know...it goes against the woman must talk on the phone gene : ) (Totally worth any backlash, just to say that) but give it a shot some time, and...you have to do it more than once or twice or a few times.
Yeah...its one of those trick things...but worth the effort.
Experience is a brutal teacher, but you learn. My God, do you learn. - C.S. Lewis
Life is usually all about how you handle Plan B. - Jack3Beans
Listen without defending; Speak without offending - FaithinAK
Jack-I really have tried to be the first one to end the convo, he beats me to it almost everytime dangit! I don't say goodbye anymore and can usually here him saying it when I am hanging up...I will try harder to be the first! No backlash from me but trying to not use as many words in my posts for you guys!!! :-)
Glad to make you laugh NM and Mila! FM....hate to say it cuz' everytime I do something happens but I really do think I am getting there with the detachment!
Question...
H "offered" the truck to me to take to the graduation party since my vehicle is iffy right now and haven't had it looked at, (although I did get power steering fluid and coolant OP!) so he is going to bring it in the morning and take mine I guess. As everyone who has read my thread knows, that truck is mine and told him he could use it for a couple of more weeks, a couple of weeks ago to finish getting the junk out of our rental house.
Since I will have it here, how do I ask for my vehicle back and tell him the truck can stay here now "nicely"?
M48 H53 M16 T18 S16 D13 SS30 H drops bomb PA/8-30-09 H leaves 12-30-09 D filed by H 2-10 H asks to come home 4-11 Piecing
Well, one option is to joke about it like "thanks for lending me my truck! Just in the nick of time, too...looks like I will be needing it full time again."
or
"Thanks so much for returning my truck! Just in time for the road trip, too!" or "Thanks for returning my truck! I do want you to know that I will be keeping it now, though."
CW- he filed for D, I know it isn't complete yet (and hopefully won't ever be because he will end the A with OW!) but you don't have to be super nice. Polite but assertive... you know?
And you know how I am nervous about being too rude! But I swear I would be able to say any of those statements to my WH!
me,34 exH,34 S,16 months S:3/31/09-left for OW started DBing 10/09 d final: sometime 10/10 current: http://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2022856&page=1 met in 2004
CW, just tell your H that you need to keep the truck because you don't know how long you'll be able to depend on your car. If he protests tell him that he knew that you only loaned it to him for a while, also being the caring father that he is you knew he wouldn't want his children being escorted around in an undependable vehicle.
CW - Nice of him to "offer" you your truck.... Is the car you are driving now a marital asset? If it is, I would just tell him to take that and have it fixed if he wants to. That you will have to keep YOUR truck because it's reliable and you need it for the kids. You don't have to be rude about it, explain it nicely and appeal to his fatherly sense..."I know that you care about the kids" kind of speech
M53 H54 D17 M33Y T38Y Bomb OW 09/09 OUT 10/09 BACK 11/09 OUT 01/10 WANTS TO R 04/10 BACK with OW 05/10 Wants to Reconcile 05/11 I said NO
It's always the oddest thing; they make it clear they do NOT want us, but yet end up doing a few nice things FOR us...
Guilt showing just a little?
I'm glad you're getting your truck back without a fight, CW...now KEEP it!
You continue to be doing well in spite of everything that keeps happening that looks very weird....and I know it gets confusing, but just allow things to unfold as they should.
Guilt might not make a good bed fellow, but sometimes it can work to your advantage especially if you need something.
Have a good one and be careful on your trip.
Remember, as each person is different, every MLC/Transition is different..what works for one may not work for another. Most of the time it is trial and error for ALL involved.
