Piano- do not regret "not working on yourself" the last 4-5 months...you planned for living and financial arrangements without H just in case. You were able to identify areas that you need to improve so you can still work on those. You have not ruined your chances for reconciliation- my SIL was extremely angry with her H (and DO NOT FORGET that you have EVERY RIGHT to be angry!) and he still came crawling back...after they D'd!
me,34 exH,34 S,16 months S:3/31/09-left for OW started DBing 10/09 d final: sometime 10/10 current: http://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2022856&page=1 met in 2004