"I'm a Good Guy, Not Like My Runaway Dad, I'm Just Being True to Myself and I'm In Love with Someone Else"
^^ There. That's my WAH.
I added the 'true to myself' because it's been his mantra also.
G- were they always that way? I suspect so, and I suspect I overlooked it, normalised it, made excuses. It just never manifested SO LARGE before.
I don't think they are mentally ill. I think they are deficient, and 'in crisis'.
"Tyring my best" ... I am struggling to answer this one... I am not sure what he means by it.. comes closest to your "That talking to us is taking so much energy and effort that it's the best they can do?", . Since he arrived, H has always told me how busy and tired he was/is, as a way of not calling me, seeing me, interracting with me.
In previous times, H has only ever been so busy and tired when it comes to his mum. Now it's me and his mum in the same basket. He is NEVER busy and tired for anyone else. 'Busy and tired' is a way of saying 'you're an emotional drag/load for me. Get out of my sight".
My H is also stubborn and rebellious - e.g his comment "I am prepared to lose everyone over this".
